


These hearts will be flooded tonight

by narrylarry



Category: One Direction
Genre: A lot - Freeform, Adventures, Broken Homes, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Baggage, F/M, Fluff, Lawyer!Niall, Middle Age AU, Pining, Pining Niall, SO MUCH FLUFF, Traveling, Unrequited Love, a lot of cuddling, ava thinks its very important, awkward cuddling too, cuddling too, niall doesnt mind, niall has chest hair, niall helps her put it back together, nine am pancakes too, nurse!ava
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-14
Updated: 2015-09-07
Packaged: 2018-04-09 05:20:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4335380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/narrylarry/pseuds/narrylarry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I can't sleep," she mumbled shyly. it wasn't something she usually did.</p><p>"so you came over for 2am cuddles?" Niall asked, amusement laced in his tired voice.</p><p>Ava nodded, pulling at the sleeves of her sweater.</p><p> </p><p>or Ava moves in across the hall. Niall can't help but pine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

Ava was twenty nine, a nurse in a doctors office specializing in blood disorders and various cancers. she worked from 7 to 5 on the weekdays and nine to one on Saturdays. she moved to manchester for the better job, yes, a ten hour day was better than her old job. coming out of a breakup, and losing a friend, it seemed like a good time to start over, to surround herself in a city full of strangers. 

 

 

a month after moving in, her flat smelled like candles and washing detergent, the heat on high, heavy lidded, she sipped a warm cup of tea. 

 

 

her life was becoming a routine and she loved that. her building was quiet and friendly. no one bothered with anyone else. a part of Ava liked that because it was comforting in a way. she didn't have to worry about nosey neighbors or loud families upstairs. it's was nice. her life was nice. 

 

 

she's only spoken to a few of her neighbors, the one across the hall was not one of them. he left right after her most days and came home late most nights. on the weekends he stayed in, Ava took note of that. he kept to himself but was friendly. 

 

 

when their busy lives finally collided, it was wonderful. he finally noticed the small brunette girl that holed herself up in the winter. 

 

 

he bumped into her early Saturday morning, knocking her coffee out of her hand and onto the floor. 

 

 

"I'm so sorry," he cried, steadying her by the shoulders. "I wasn't paying attention- I'm late for a meeting. I'm so sorry- I hate to-" 

 

 

"don't worry about it," she picked her throw away cup. "I- just go," she shook her head fishing her keys out of her purse. she was just so mad. he really didn't have any consideration because she was late to and cranky. she'd have to go without her coffee this morning because he, whoever he was, couldn't look up from his emails for a second to watch where he was going.

 

 

she really didn't feel like having a shit day like the others because it felt like she couldn't catch a break anywhere. she just wanted someone to spare her a thought once in a while. when 

 

 

Ava came home late that evening with takeaway Chinese and six pack of wine coolers, blondie was leaving his flat. 

 

 

"rough day, eh?" he eyed the liquor store back. 

 

 

Ava let out an unreadable chuckle, setting the bag down to pull her keys out. 

 

 

"what are you drinking tonight?" he asked, making more conversation than necessary. 

 

 

Ava bit her tongue, forcing a smile, "wine coolers for one." 

 

 

"I see," he nodded. "I'm Niall." 

 

 

"Ava," she shook her head, rubbing her forehead. "I've had a long day and I'd appreciate this small talk ending." 

 

 

"ouch," Niall chuckled. 

 

 

Ava let out a humorless chuckle, turning around, crossing her arms over her chest, "so, Niall, what do you do?"

 

 

"I'm a lawyer," he straightened up as if his posted in jeans and a jumper would make him look better. 

 

 

"that's answers all of my questions," she shook her head, unlocking her door. 

 

 

"what's that supposed to mean?" Niall barked, clearly offended. 

 

 

"you practically bulldozed me over this morning and then blew it off-" 

 

 

"I apologized," he argued. "twice!" 

 

 

"right," Ava laughed. "because two apologies gets rid of the migraine I've had all day." 

 

 

"I had to go," he mumbled, feeling tremendously small compared to her. 

 

 

"I was late too, for your information," she snapped. "and then you want to try and be a proper gentleman making conversation," she laughed humorlessly. "safe your time."

 

 

if Niall was reevaluating his life after she slammed her door, she doesn't get that satisfaction. 

 

 

 

*** 

 

 

 

Ava didn't try to be mean. she was tried and frustrated and her head throbbed. she hasn't been sleeping well in the new place and its taking a toll. 

 

 

when she bumped into him the next morning she though about pretending the hated him still but he was awfully cute and probably had nice smelling hair.

 

 

"I'm uh- I'm sorry 'bout the whole stereotyping you based on job thing," she waved her hand unceremoniously."it was a bad day." 

 

 

Niall shrugged casually, "don't lose sleep over it, yeah?" 

 

 

Ava chuckled shaking her head. she wished this was the reason she was losing sleep. 

 

 

"since I so gracefully knocked your coffee out of your hand, coffee on me," Niall offered, praying she said yes and didn't yell at him. 

 

 

"I'd love to," she smiled apologetically and a part of her wished she could blow off the plans. 

 

 

"there's a but isn't there?" Niall pulled his eyebrows together, pulling the biggest puppy dog face he could muster. 

 

 

"I have a prior commitment, maybe next time," she squeezed his arm apologetically. "bad timing."

 

 

 

___ 

 

 

 

there was never good timing, Ava learned. she was coming the same time he was going vice versa. Niall thought it was unfair because Ava came out of her little world and into his wearing a pair of pajama pants that looked too big to be hers with messy hair and pretty flushed cheeks.

 

 

he had to take a moment and remember how to breathe because Ava was this cute little thing that could also beat him up but he'd take a chance on it.

 

 

"day off?" he smiled down at her. "gonna catch up on your beauty sleep?"

 

 

"yeah," she smiled sleepily. "proper lie in today."

 

 

"just don't sleep in too long, yeah? too much beauty sleep can cause jealousy, you know." 

 

 

Ava rolled her eyes, but the fond smile stayed on her lips. 

 

 

___ 

 

 

Ava knew she really shouldn't have agreed to meet him. it wasn't good. they were supposed to be getting over each other not meeting up, exchanging emails.

 

 

Ava rubbed her forehead, taking a deep breath. it's been a month and three days. the thought of him still makes her heart ache. 

 

 

"Ava," he smiled. "I-I didn't think you would come."

 

 

"brandon," she nodded curtly. 

 

 

"you look great," he sat down in the chair across from her. "I've missed you, you know." 

 

 

"no-" she shook her head. "we're not- we're not getting back together. you have my mail?" 

 

 

"right," he nodded. "I-uh- here." he handed her the magazine. it was one she didn't even like. it was about stocks and business something she wasn't even invested in. 

 

 

"brandon why do you keep doing this?" she asked, pained. "I'm moving on, making friends, getting rid of everything I left in London, including you. why- why'd you follow me?"

 

 

"I miss you Ava," he leaned forward, grabbing her cold hands. "this time we can work on things. I'll be better. I'll be the man you want me to be." 

 

 

"brandon stop!" she yelled, squeezing her eyes shut. "you're not the man I want. you-you latch on to me and I can't breathe and you never let me have my space and you always stick your nose in everything- even here! I- I can't. just go home. I don't want you here," she grabbed her coffee, storming out. 

 

 

her eyes stung as she walked down the street. her flat was only a short walk but she was sure if she cried, her tears would freeze onto her face.

 

 

she let out deep, labored breaths as she clutched her purse, walking into the building. she prayed Niall was home. 

 

 

standing in front of his door, it was a lot harder to knock. she raised a fist, holding her breath. 

 

 

Niall opened the door, bright eyed, surprised smile. "Ava," he breathed out. "what's up?" 

 

 

"do you have plans?" she asked, "for the rest of the day I mean." 

 

 

"no," Niall smiled. "I don't."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter gets very cute at the end so please keep reading :)

 

Niall didn't really know what to think when he walked into her flat. it smelled like vanilla cookies and was so warm and soft, like Ava. she wasn't completely settled in yet; there was two boxes sitting in the corner of the living room, untouched.

"I have hot coco," she offered, "or tea or coffee."

"I'd love a cup of tea," he smiled. she pulled out a baby blue mug for him and a red one for her. Ava bit her lip thinking about how the cup matched his eyes.

Niall learned early that Ava wasn't much for small talk (when she wasn't yelling at him). she was quiet and reserved, always keeping to herself.

Ava handed him a hot cup of tea, sitting down next to him. she smiled softly letting out a deep breath.

"did something happen?" Niall asked, staring down at her.

"what do you mean?" she curled her fingers around her cup.

"before you came over, did something happen?" he clarified.

"why do you ask that?" she asked slowly. he was onto her.

"your mascara," he wiped under her eye. "it's running."

she let out a quiet oh, distracting herself on her chipped nail polish.

"it's okay," Niall assured her, smiling warmly. "you don't have to tell me."

she was internally grateful because it was a dark part of her she didn't want to visit anytime soon. she hoped he understood. Niall was totally okay with watching romcoms all evening, as long as it was Ava he was sitting next to (and if Jennifer Anniston was starring.)

"so, Mr. lawyer, finally get a day off?" Ava smiled, stretching her feet out on the ottoman.

"somethin' like that," Niall shrugged casually. he couldn't have her finding out that he blew a whole day of meetings off just to spend time with her could he?

___

"someone's looking rough this morning," Niall commented taking in her exhausted appearance.

Ava let out a low grumble, locking her door. "I hate Monday's." she took a big sip of coffee as they walked down the hall.

it wasn't Monday itself, it was how her upstairs neighbors just couldn't think about others when they go at it like rabbits above her at three in the morning. some people have day jobs.

"I have a lunch break at one, wanna grab a bite?" he asked casually.

"I'm napping from one to two, sorry," she smiled apologetically.

"I'll bring sandwiches," he smiled as the elevator dinged. "don't fall asleep on me."

"no promises," she let out a tired sigh as they parted ways.

it was a good friendship they had, there wasn't an overbearing pressure on either of their shoulders to be more. it helped how understanding Niall was, and also how incredibly attractive he was for when she was feeling particularly lonely, when she finally felt whole again. it would all work out in the end.

Ava didn't really expect him to bring sandwiches or even show up but he did and her heart ached because brandon never did that in the five years they dated. she was depressed again.

"I'm working on the case of this man that mass murdered his family," Niall made small talk. the usual.

"that's sad," Ava sipped her coffee.

"yeah," Niall nodded. "I have to prove he didn't do it."

"oh," Ava set her cup down, brows furrowed. "you're _that_ lawyer."

"what do you mean?" Niall chuckled.

"you defend the bad guys," Ava rolled her eyes.

"someone has to," Niall rolled his eyes. "besides, I get good money."

"but that doesn't distract from the fact that a bad guy could be proved not guilty thanks to your ability to persuade," she argued.

"relax," he smiled. "I hardly ever win."

it hasn't dawned on him that she was very much like a child until she was crinkling her nose in disgust, after taken half an onion in a bite of her sandwich. she argued like a child and laughed like a child and wrapped herself up in her blankets like a burrito and it was completely endearing.

"hardly?" she gaped at him. "that means you  _have_ won?"

"sometimes the accused is not actually guilty, you know," Niall raised an eyebrow.

"fair enough," she narrowed her eyes at him. "still not a hundred percent sure your job is good."

Niall chuckled shaking his head. she was just so pretty and cute and every other endearing word he could think of. 

" I have to get back to work," she wiped her hands on a napkin, shoving it into the bag the sandwiches came in.

 

"thanks for the food," she smiled. "I owe you."

she didn't owe him anything but that pretty little smile of hers because it was all he needed.   
  
***

 

"who's this?" Niall asked pointing to a picture on her wall.

"that's me and my mum."

"no the bloke with his arm around your waist," Niall scanned over the picture again. she was so happy.

Ava stood up, ignoring him. she took the picture off the wall and stuffed it back into a box.

"Ava," Niall spun her around. "who is that?"

"his name's Brandon but he's not important anymore," she rubbed her arm nervously. she hated talking about him.

"he broke your heart didn't he?" Niall asked quietly.

Ava nodded so softly he almost didn't see it. "I spent five years of my life on a boy that wouldn't let me grow," Ava shook her head. "I don't even miss _him_. I miss having someone, you know? just having someone to talk to and to have a lie down with. it was just five years of me giving him my all, and getting nothing back."

"it's his loss," Niall turned away from her. "if I had you, I'd never let you go."

___

Ava chanced it, grabbing her pillow, making her way across the hall. she knocked twice listening to lights turning on and shuffling feet inside.

the door opened to a bleary eyed Niall. he stood in a pair of grey sweatpants and a loose t-shirt while Ava wore a big jumper that swallowed her up and a pair of pajama pants Niall hoped didn't belong to brandon.

"I can't sleep," she mumbled shyly. it wasn't something she usually did.

"so you came over for 2am cuddles?" Niall asked, amusement laced in his tired voice.

Ava nodded, pulling at the sleeves of her sweater.

Niall led her through his dimly lit flat and into his bedroom that was neat and boyish in smell; sweat and after shave.

Ava crawled into bed laying her pillow down farthest from the door. the bed was so soft compared to hers and it smelled a lot like niall. she was almost dizzy.

"I like sleeping by the wall," Niall pouted. he was sleep deprived too.

"but what if someone breaks in? they'll get me first," Ava mumbled. yes, it was a serious fear for her even at age 29.

"fair enough," Niall sighed."if they get me first, who will defend them in court?"

Ava let out a little sound of either amusement or annoyance; he couldn't tell but it was endearing.

"I like being the small spoon," she whispered so Niall wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her into his chest. she smelled sweet and soft like bath soap and flowers. he refrained from burying his nose in her neck. he didn't know if that was allowed.

but nonetheless, Niall awoke at 5am with his nose pressed against her neck, breathing hotly against her. her hair splayed out in fifty different direction. she probably had morning breath as bad as his but he wouldn't mind kissing her right now.

it was 5am and he was already thinking about kissing the shy girl that was still very much hurting. he didn't know she felt about him but he'd let her sleep in his bed every night for the rest of his life as long as she was even a fraction of a bit of happy as she was in that photo with brandon.

Ava didn't have to be up until six so he let her sleep because she looked peaceful and content and he really didn't have the heart to wake her so early.

he got in the shower thinking about the way Ava's eyes shine so bright when she smiles and the pinkness of her cheeks. this was getting real bad.

Ava woke up groggy and somewhat content with how much she had slept. Niall was glad she didn't wake up with him flushed up against her because she might have left without a second thought.

"why did you wake me?" she whispered pulling the duvet up to her eyes.

Niall shrugged, pulling a shirt over his head. it'd be very awkward if he told her that she looked so pretty whenshe slept and he just couldn't wake her.

"how very sweet of you," she sat up, rubbing her eyes. she let out a deep sigh because work was not something she wanted to do today. she grabbed her pillow and pulled her hair out of the now messed up ponytail.

"thank you," she whispered, kissing him on the cheek. he didn't realize how much it meant to her that he let her do this.

___

 

late nights at Niall's office were occurring more often. Ava couldn't help it, though. he had a really nice couch in his office and a table she could do her work at and he always bought her favorite Chinese food. it was hard not to want to go there.

the best thing was was Niall, sleepy and messy hair trying to stay awake to go through paperwork and evidence. Ava was sleepy just watching him.

the people in his office were nice like Harry. he was a lawyer too. (he defended the good guys so Ava immediately liked him.) he had really curly hair and a cute little boyfriend that always hung around after hours too. Ava would be lying if she said she didn't want to sit down and have a cup of coffee with them.

Niall set his glasses down, rubbing his eyes. Ava has been staring at the ceiling for the past half hour. she was almost asleep.

"why are you still here?" Niall chuckled, leaning back in his chair. "it's really late."

"I know," she smiled, rolling on her side. she didn't know why she stayed but she knew if she was home she'd be wishing she was here.

"I think I'll call it a night," Niall sighed standing up. he pulled both his suit jacket and heavy coat on and grabbed his briefcase.

Ava stood up, slipping her shoes back on. she pulled her jacket on, pocketing her hat and scarf. it was so warm in his office too.

"Ava," Niall cried, stopping her. "you're going to freeze." he pulled her hat and scarf out of her pocket and put them both on her.

Ava crinkled her nose laughing as he did. brandon never made sure she was warm. he never gave up his jacket or made her button up.

"silly girl," Niall shook his head, turning the lights out. "let's go, yeah?"

in the car, Ava gripped the steering wheel tight. her breathe was white in the cold. she sat stiff as the heat warmed up before turning it up on full blast. she watched Niall pull out of the parking lot first.

Ava thought about driving around because her mind was in overdrive with him. she knew if she didn't pull into the building after him he'd come over and make sure she was alright or call before he went to bed because that was the kind of person he was.

she took deep uneven breaths thinking about what exactly she wanted out of him. all she knew was she wanted him to hold her hand and kiss her on the forehead and maybe drive her to work sometimes but another part of her was really scared because she didn't want to invest her time into something that would only leave her lonely and sad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'll update every other day. this one will be on a faster track than the wattpad one. the *** are where the chapters end and begin incase you were wondering. 
> 
> KUDOS IS MUCH APPRECIATED


	3. chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is so fluffy and cute it just keeps getting better. 
> 
> really srry about not updating I've been busy and i just saw the boys and they were amazing live. 
> 
> i'm also trying to update in time with wattpad so sorry again :P

 

"hi mum," she mumbled into the phone. the breakup with brandon left her family gutted and disappointed because he was a surgeon and made good money and she made enough to get by. 

"Ava, how are you doing in the new city?" she asked sweetly. 

it was a bit sad because a month and a half into her new start and she's just now calling. she's been bitter for months. 

"it's fine," Ava stirred her tea. she wasn't interested in this small talk. 

 

"have you seen brandon lately?" she asked. 

 

"no I haven't," she lied. "we've both moved on."

 

"he called me a few days ago, Ava. he said you won't return his calls." Ava could practically see the frown on her face. "why won't you call him back? I thought he was really good for you." 

 

"you know, mum," Ava shook her head. "maybe you don't always know what's best for me. you keep telling me to forgive him and go just get over things but I can't, mum. I can't just pretend he didn't hurt me and use me."

 

"Ava, don't be daft." her mum sighed. "who cares if he has a few flaws? the rock on your finger will make it worth while."

 

"no, mum," she shook her head. "I need more out of a relationship unlike you. I marry for love not money."

 

 

___

 

 

"so a few of the lads are comin' over tomorrow night for drinks and stuff. d'ya wanna come?" Niall asked. 

 

"hm I don't know," Ava chewed on her bottom lip. "a room full of fancy lawyer boys, I don't know."

 

"come on, it'll be fun," Niall smiled. "just a casual evening watching a football match. louis and Harry'll be there."

 

Ava shrugged, "why not."

 

she definitely didn't agree just because louis and Harry were going to be there. and it seemed as good a time as ever to show Niall her not so graceful competitive side. 

 

now things didn't exactly go over well when Ava showed up in her manchester jersey and Niall wearing his derby jersey. it was clear, it would be a long night. 

 

Harry tried to cover her up before Niall saw but louis pulled him off and Niall dropped his slice of pizza on the kitchen floor. 

 

"Ava- I- I can't believe-" he gasped. "you're one of _them_ ".

 

Ava let out the cutest giggle Niall forgot all about the opposing teams for a second and forgot how to breathe. 

 

"I just can't even look at you the same anymore," Niall breathed out, holding onto a tall brown haired boy for support. 

 

Ava gave the room a little shrug, reaching for a bottle of beer. she was even more excited to get this night started. 

 

and it was... something. Niall was shocked at how competitive she was and just her basic knowledge of football on the first place. she argued over ref calls three times and she was right all three times. it was a little embarrassing for the other lads. 

 

they all really liked her. louis, Ava learned was a school teacher, Liam and Andy were fireman. it was a room full of rowdy boys that had just as much to drink as Ava and loved football almost the same as her. 

 

"I did not expect you to be so..." Niall trailed off waving a hand vaguely. 

 

"competitive? boyish?" Ava chuckled. 

 

"no," Niall laughed. "into sports."

 

"my dad got me into it," Ava nodded. she could talk for hours about her father. 

 

"I'm really glad you came," Niall smiled opening the door. 

 

"me too," Ava smiled and it reached her eyes. 

 

pride bubbled up in his stomach because he got her smiling like she did in those pictures. he would do anything to keep it there. 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

it was a month before Ava was knocking on Niall's door late at night. it was warming up which meant Ava wore sweatshirts and sleep shorts to bed (and thick socks on her feet). 

 

"thought you'd never come," Niall smiled opening the door. 

 

Ava smiled up at him nervously and shyly. it still felt a little strange. 

 

Ava crawled into bed while Niall brushed his teeth. she watched him in the bathroom from the bed, pillow clutched to her chest. 

 

Ava was a quiet little kitten that just needed to be held and taken care of. she was trying to do it on her own and Niall liked that but he also like the idea of holding her hand when she was scared (i.e. all the time). 

 

"is this gonna be a thing?" Niall asked, resting a hand on her hip. 

 

"I don't know," Ava whispered nervously. 

 

"well if you can't sleep, you know where I am." 

 

the next morning Ava woke up nervous and flustered. she was flushed up against Niall, sheets tangled between them. 

 

it sent a weird warmth up her spine because she wasn't bothered by it. not in the least bit. she wouldn't mind waking up like this on the regular and that scared her the most. 

 

 

 ___

 

 

the changing of seasons meant colds and flu season. it was the worst part of Ava's life. she spent more time getting sick and worrying about it than she did actually enjoying the snow melting around them. 

 

when she didn't leave her flat in three days Niall sent her text. 

 

  
**okay??**  

 

  
_cold :(_ , she replied. 

 

he could hear the pout in her voice and picture the glassiness of her eyes. 

 

he knew he should stay away because he probably couldn't help himself to kissing her. he would get a cold and complicate things. 

 

Niall really couldn't help leaving a box of tissues and a new box of Yorkshire tea in front of her door. he hoped she smiled when she opened the door to get the paper. 

 

and Niall got the cutest blissed out selfie of hers. she was in pajamas with sheep all over it. her nose was an angry red and she had tired eyes and her hair hasn't been brushed but she looked happy. she was happy. 

 

Niall set his phone down with silly smile on his face and rubbed his forehead. she was overwhelming to even look at. 

 

as he ran his hands through his hair over a thousand times that night he could never stop thinking about her or stop looking at the silly picture. 

 

  
the next Saturday, Niall was standing in front of a sleepy, sick Ava with a grocery bag in hand. 

 

"what are you doing here?" she asked shyly. 

 

"I've come to make you better," he exclaimed, stepping inside. 

 

he was over eager to be at her every beck and call and she saw that. 

 

"you don't- you don't have to," she mumbled. 

 

"I know," he smiled, voice softening. "I want to."

 

Brandon never came over when she was sick. he wouldn't touch her with a fifty foot pole because he couldn't afford to get sick. 

 

Niall pushed her into the living room while he made her soup and tea. she was nasally and cold and too much for Niall to handle. 

 

she sat down across from Niall at the table. she sipped her tea first, not feeling up to eating.  

 

"I think I'm feeling better," Ava coughed. 

 

"I think you're still sick," Niall smiled fondly. 

 

Ava let out little moans when she /had/ to finish her soup and drink all of the broth. she hated that. 

 

Niall took her bedding down to the first floor to wash while Ava was in the bath. she she couldn't get better if she was sleeping in the same germs. 

 

an hour later, Ava was letting herself fall on a set of very warm bedding that smelled like Niall's detergent. she wanted to pull Niall into bed with her but he'd get sick too- if he wasn't  already. 

 

"sleep a bit," he smiled, turning her light off. "let me know if you need anything."

 

when he shut all the lights off in her place, he found himself standing in front of a very annoyed Liam. 

 

"you said you were busy today but you're hanging out with Ava?" Liam raised an eyebrow. 

 

"I wasn't hanging out with her," Niall mumbled. "she's sick."

 

"so you take care of her when she's sick?" Liam asked. Niall nodded. "jesus why aren't you two sleeping together yet," Liam moaned. 

 

"she's not into that," Niall shrugged. 

 

"she's not into that or you?" Liam raised an eyebrow. 

 

Niall's chest ached because she can't be into her when she still misses Brandon. he wouldn't be the guy to push her. 

 

"is there a reason you're here?" Niall asked, dryly. 

 

"I was gonna ask you to come to a pub tonight but I can see you're too in love with her to come. just in case she needs her pillow fluffed."

 

Niall was hurt by the way he was saying that he was whipped and also that she was so dependent on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really hope you liked this *nervous smile* kudos is much appreciated. 
> 
> I will always answer messages and reply to comments so feel free to talk to me :))


	4. Chapter 4

 

in an act of showing liam how not in love he was, he handed over his phone for the night.

 

a proper lad night was something they don't do often and it felt great.

 

Niall just sat back and relaxed, drinking his beer slowly. it was good to get out and forget about everything for a little while.

 

"yeah, Niall's girlfriend is sick," Liam gave the lads a mock frowny face.

 

"she's not my girlfriend," Niall groaned. "leave me alone."

 

"all I'm saying is that Niall drools all over her and she knows it," Liam shrugged.

 

"she just got out of a relationship, alright?" Niall rolled his eyes.

 

louis let out a little condescending chuckle and so Niall stood up, "I'll see you lads later."

 

he threw a twenty down on the table ignoring their pleas to stay. he came out for a stress free night but got the exact opposite.

 

he knew he shouldn't have slipped into her dark apartment because it was a bit creepy and it showed just how in love he was with her.

 

he turned on the living room light and went down the hallway into her room. she was asleep but sweating bullets.

 

Niall put a hand on her forehead. she was on fire. he didn't know how she was still asleep. she was nearly soaked in sweat.

 

"Ava." he shook her awake. "Ava you're burning up."

 

her breathing got even more deep and labored. she wouldn't say anything, only let out the smallest little groan.

 

Niall used a thermometer to check her temperature. it was so high he had to take her to the hospital.

 

"Ava, love," Niall pushed her sweaty hair back out of her eyes. "we have to go to the hospital. d'ya think you can get up?"

 

"no," she mumbled. "no I was sleeping. m'fine."

 

"you're not," Niall murmured, helping her up. "you're really warm. I think you need to see a doctor."

 

"I was fine," she breathed out, closing her eyes.

 

"we'll just find out for sure, yeah?" Niall steadied her on her feet.

 

it was was really complicated. he didn't know her medical history, her birthday, or any of the information needed on the medical record. he copied all the information down from her license and answers as vaguely as he could.

 

Ava curled herself up in a ball on the seat next to him, breathing heavily. she promised Niall she wouldn't fall asleep.

 

the doctor finally saw her an hour later. she was half asleep, sweating even more. her temperature rose about three degrees and it wasn't good.

 

the doctor pushed Niall out of the room with a dry, "I'm gonna have to ask you to wait outside, sir."

 

Niall groaned, sliding down the wall, pulling at his hair nervously. it would be such a long and anxious wait.

 

"she just had a bacterial infection," the doctor assured him. "we gave her antibiotics to bring her temperature down."

 

"can I see her?" he shoved his hands in his pockets.

 

"come back tomorrow morning," the doctor told him. "she'll sleep through the the rest of the night and late tomorrow."

 

he didn't want to. he wanted to stay all night and make sure she didn't wake up and if she did, he'd be there to comfort her but he drug his feet home.

 

Niall got up early; around seven he left Ava's apartment, grabbing a change of clothes for her. he got breakfast and coffee before he went to the hospital.

 

when he got there she was awake, eating oatmeal with a shaky hand. her chest hurt and so did her arm from the IV.

 

she smiled so brightly seeing him walk in, like she was waiting all morning for him to come.

 

"how ya feeling, pet?" Niall asked. he set her bag down on the chair in the corner of the room.

 

"good," she murmured. "tired."

 

"yeah?" Niall sat down next to her bed. "sleep alright?"

 

Ava shrugged. "it's all a little blurry."

 

"oh," Niall stood up abruptly, digging around in the bag he packed. "it's really cold in here and I knew you'd be cold- because you're always cold- so I brought you..." he trailed off holding up a cardigan and a pair of thick socks.

 

her tummy warmed at how thoughtful and considerate he was. he was worried about her feet before himself. it was overwhelming.

 

"thank you, Niall," she whispered, eyes welling up with tears.

 

"hey," Niall chuckled, "it's just a pair of socks, yeah? no need to get sentimental."

 

"it's just," she waved her hand vaguely. "just everything you've done for me. it means so much."

 

"no big deal," he assured her, handing over the cardigan. "socks or no socks?"

 

"socks," she smiled. "please."

 

in the midst of Niall putting her socks on, a tall brunette boy came in, looking worried out of his mind.

 

"Ava," he breathed out, grabbing her hand. "Ava I was so worried. your mum called. I came as soon as I could."

 

Ava looked uncomfortable and mortified at the same time. she pulled her hand out of his, playing with the blankets nervously.

 

Niall put her last sock on and moved to the other side of her bed, opposite of the boy.

 

Ava cleared her throat, looking up at Niall. "this is- this is brandon, Niall."

 

all of the confusion fell from Niall's face only to be replaced with jealousy and annoyance.

 

"it was really nice of you to bring Ava to the hospital," brandon nodded. "now that I'm moving back I can take care of her."

 

Ava bit down on her bottom lip, looking away. she wanted to cry. she was /going/ to cry.

 

"oh yeah?" Niall slid his hand into Ava's. "usually boyfriends check up on their girls so I don't think that's your job."

 

"we talked about it," brandon nodded. "we're getting back together."

 

"that would mean that Ava and I would be you know... breaking up- or in an open relationship- but thinking about it, I don't think either are true," Niall smiled apologetically.

 

"but-" brandon looked down at her, heartbroken. "Ava- you guys are dating?"

 

"yeah," Niall smiled, squeezing Ava's hand. "one month strong."

 

"that would mean," he looked up at Niall. "you two started dating a month after we broke up."

 

"yeah," Niall smiled down at Ava. "a kiss really can mend a broken heart."

 

"is this true?" brandon breathed out. "are you two together?"

 

Ava nodded, blinking fast. "we are."

 

-

 

 

Ava recovered well. she was back to work in 2 days. as for Niall, the relentless reading continued after a while. even though that was a scary night, they forgot about it after a week.

 

Niall was still very much in love with Ava especially when on the weekends, she hung around his more than hers.

 

while Niall worked in the other room, she lounged on the couch watching movies but also making sure he was okay. she brought him tea and made sure he ate or else he probably wouldn't.

 

"you're the best," Niall hummed, wrapping his hands around his mug.

 

Niall really wanted to comment on the new way she was wearing her hair and tell her how nice she looked dressing down. all things that were sure to make her redden, and also things that would complicate their situation.

 

being friends was a hard thing to do especially when he dreams about pushing her against the wall and putting his mouth-

 

"Niall," Ava smiled down at him. "I have Thor on."

 

now after Niall ten minute spiel about how much he loved chris hemsworth Ava just couldn't go another day without finding out what he was all about.

 

"I have work to do for Tuesday," Niall sighed, rubbing his eyes.

 

"but it's Friday," Ava pouted. "you can finish tomorrow."

 

"I have mountains of papers go go though," he sighed again. "there's so much evidence and so little we can use. I just like have to read through it all and separate it and-"

 

"stop," she whined, grabbing his hand. "we're watching a movie and you're going to sit there and enjoy it."

 

"I've already seen Thor," Niall shrugged. "I can recite lines from it if you'd like."

 

"can't you spare me two hours?" Ava pouted.

 

she was pouting. how could he have said no?

 

not even a half hour into the movie, someone was at the door. Ava was far too entranced watching the movie so Niall got it.

 

liam and the rest of the lads were standing with a six pack and two rollups.

 

"ready for lads night?" Liam grinned.

 

their smiles faded when they heard Ava inside cheering Thor on like he was running a race. the movie was almost deafening but her yelling was louder.

 

"are you kidding me?" Liam frowned, annoyed.

 

"we're watching Thor," Niall smiled weakly.

 

"we made these plans on Wednesday," Harry huffed, latching onto louis.

 

"I've been so busy with work I forgot," Niall sighed heavily. "I can ask her to leave?"

 

"don't be a fool," Liam snapped. "you can't ask her to leave! she'll scratch your eyes out and eat us alive."

 

"don't stress out, yeah?" louis gave Liam a dirty look. "drugs were Liam's idea anyways."

 

"Liam, were almost all thirty year old men and you're still acting like we're eighteen," Harry shook his head. "can't face the fact that little nialler's growing up can ya?"

 

louis ruffled Niall's hair as they walked through the door. Harry and Louis went to the kitchen while Liam stuffed his baggy into his pocket.

 

"more like can't deal with being blown off," Liam scoffed. "she can't even give you the time of day but you treat her like a queen." he shook his head. "just don't get it."

 

"you don't even know what the hell you're talking about, Liam," Niall bit out.

 

"now now, lads," louis patted Niall on the back reassuringly. "we're all a little stressed out, yeah? let's join Ava in the living room and finish watching Thor."

 

"yeah of course," Liam scoffed. "gotta gather in the living room were queenie is."

 

Ava stood in the doorway feeling ashamed and angry. her face was red from either anger or embarrassment, Niall didn't know.

 

"I'll just uh go then," she grabbed her purse off the counter. her eyes were on the floor as she walked through the group of boys.

 

Liam closed his gaping mouth watching as the door closed behind her.

 

Niall was fuming. he could punch something, anything. preferably Liam's face because he didn't know anything.

 

"what the fuck is wrong with you," Niall yelled in Liam's face. "what are you playing at, Liam? just wanna see a grown women cry?"

 

he was almost certain she was close to tears over there. he knew what she was like and bullying wasn't something she was good with.

 

"I didn't think she could hear," Liam rolled his eyes. "she needs thicker skin."

 

"what the hell!" louis yelled, clearly bothered by it too.

 

"just get out of my sight before I lay you out," Niall shook his head, turning away.

 

"you're seriously upset over this?" Liam laughed.

 

Niall brushed past Liam and went out the door. without knocking he went into Ava's flat.

 

she was in the living room watching tv, wrapped in a big blanket. she looked unbelievably sad.

 

"Ava," Niall whispered sitting down next to her. "I'm so sorry. I don't know why Liam said all those things."

 

"I didn't know your friends didn't like me," Ava mumbled. "you could have told me."

 

"they do like you," Niall argued, grabbing her hands. "Liam didn't mean it."

 

Ava took a deep breath. "brandon never introduced me to his friends. w-was that why? because I interfere?"

 

"of course not," Niall assured her, squeezing her hand. "you don't interfere with anything. the lads all really like you, I swear."

 

"why would Liam said that if he didn't mean it?" Ava looked up at him. she sounded so hurt.

 

"none of it was true," Niall argued again. "you're amazing to be around."

 

Ava stayed quiet so Niall continued. "Liam's jealous, that's why he said it. if I'm not working, I'm with you and he doesn't like that. besides, why would I want to hang out with Liam when I can hang out with you?"

 

Ava's eyes flicked up to his fast almost not believing him.

 

"you smell much nicer and you laugh at my jokes. I love being around you. it's my favorite part of the day, if I'm honest."

 

"d'you really mean that?" Ava asked softly, eyes shining.

 

"'course," Niall smiled. he wanted to kiss her really bad. it was one of those moments where he was going to, on impulse but at the last second, realized it wasn't a thing they did.

 

Ava smiled, looking away shyly. "you should get back. they're probably wondering where you are."

 

"tomorrow," Niall kisses her on the forehead. "I'm all yours after two."


	5. Chapter 5

 

Niall didn't realize how much self control he had until he had to use all of it.

 

to prove how carefree Niall was, it was a night out at a bar. louis, Harry, Liam, and his girlfriend, sophia. Niall knew it was going to be a horrible night when Ava walked out dressed in a tank top and jeans.

 

"ready?" she smiled.

 

they were the same height with the heels she had on. it was unfair. he didn't like this new side of Ava. Niall felt like a dad because all he wanted was Ava to go back and change into maybe a sweater and big pants to hide herself.

 

but Ava pulled it off so well- when she didn't talk or smile because her bright little sunshine smile defeated her clothes in an instant.

 

as soon as they got there, Niall decided a bar was not the place for an Ava. the men were all horny and wasted and just wanted to take the girls into the bathroom.

 

Niall felt anxiety bubbling in his stomach watching the way some guys looked at her. he wouldn't be the one to ruin the night so he pushed Ava into a booth in the corner.

 

"I've never been to a bar," Ava smiled looking around.

 

"what a shame," Niall smiled. "first rounds on me, then. "

 

when the rest of them filed in, the chatter was loud and energetic but Niall couldn't ignore the way Ava was looking around, looking like she wanted to be the girl dancing or chatted up at the bar.

 

"ya alright?" Niall asked quietly. Ava nodded, giving him her reassuring smile he always got.

 

"think I'm gonna use the loo," she stood up, still smiling down at him.

 

her soft smiles were what kept him up at night. it was hauntingly beautiful especially when some nights she was sleeping on Niall's couch like a little kid.

 

Niall sipped his beer slow trying to keep up with the conversation but he was distracted by the urge of wanting really bad to push Ava up against the wall and kiss her pretty little pink lips until her lipstick was on his instead.

 

they just didn't understand. louis and Harry were in love from the start. Liam and Sophia fell into love while Niall was positive he was the only one that fell in love.

 

it seemed silly on the outside because he was hopelessly in love with her and she tried not to notice.

 

Niall wished he could read Ava's mind because it would be much easier to know what she wanted.

 

the thing was, when it came down to it, he'd make a decision to make Ava happy, not himself. he'd always chose her well being over his because he cares about her so much.

 

Ava came back a good ten minutes later, sliding into the booth silently. she didn't want to come because Liam still scared her but Niall promised he didn't mean it (even though he did).

 

"so Ava, you're a nurse?" Liam asked. Ava nodded. "what's that like?"

 

"I like it," Ava shrugged. "I like seeing the kids and stuff, you know? I like helping them."

 

"so would you say you're caring?" Harry asked. "about people?"

 

"um yeah," she mumbled.

 

"and their feelings as well?" he asked.

 

"yes," she looked up at Niall, eyes begging for help.

 

Niall sighed heavily, rubbing his forehead. Liam promised he wouldn't say anything but he was being a twat anyways.

 

"are you quite done?" louis raised an eyebrow. "we're having a nice time, Liam."

 

"I'm just making friendly small talk," Liam shrugged.

 

"no you're being an ass," Niall snapped.

 

"I think it's time for another round," sophia coughed, pushing Liam out of the booth "Liam and I got this one."

 

Ava let out a heavy sigh, rubbing her head. "I'm not feeling too well, Niall." she whispered. "I think I'm gonna get a cab."

 

"Ava," Niall frowned, looking down at her. "please stay?"

 

"I have some paperwork and stuff to do," she shrugged grabbing her purse.

 

louis and Harry sent her sad, apologetic smiles as Niall and her slid out.

 

"bye Ava," Harry waved with his small childlike tone. "you looked really pretty tonight."

 

and God, she did.

 

"thanks, Harry," she smiled but it didn't quite reach her eyes.

 

the bar got ten times more crowded and mad; Niall grabbed her by the hand, leading her through the crowded place and to the door.

 

"thanks for inviting me," she adjusted her purse, taking a deep breath.

 

"thanks for coming," Niall smiled hoping her nervousness would fade.

 

"I'll uhm- I'll see you tomorrow then? unless you have other plans?" she asked hesitantly. she looked so out of her element, different from the girl he brought.

 

"no," Niall brushed her hair back. " we're still on for tomorrow. text me when you get home, yeah?"

 

"okay," she took a deep breath, trying hard to smile like she meant it.

 

"hey," he frowned, grabbing her by the hips. "don't worry. you're gonna make yourself sick about it."

 

"I'm not worrying," she sighed heavily. "just upset."

 

from inside, Liam watched out the window as Niall treated her like a queen and he hated it. he couldn't stand it because Ava wasn't the girl he should be with. she wasn't even like him. she didn't treat him the way he deserved.

 

"don't be upset," Niall begged. "Liam doesn't even mean anything. louis and Harry adore you. they like you more than they like me, even. sophia likes you too. he's not good with change."

 

"i didn't even do anything," Ava mumbled. "it hurts the most because he doesn't know me."

 

"he'll come around, I promise," Niall mumbled as the cab rolled up. "get home safe, yeah?" he pressed a kiss to her forehead, paying the cabby.

 

Niall took a deep breath as the cab drove away. he shoved his hands in his pockets contemplating on going back inside. he didn't want to but he knew he was supposed to. it'd only fuel Liam's fire.

 

he sat down at the table just as Liam brought the drinks back.

 

"where'd she go?" he nodded towards the empty seat next to Niall.

 

"she who?" Niall leaned back. "she meaning Ava? because she has a name of you happened to forget."

 

"no I didn't forget," Liam sat down. "I just choose not to use it."

 

"and why would that be?" Niall leaned forward on the table.

 

"doesn't deserve it," he shrugged. "treats you like a rug. walks all over you like you're not even there."

 

"I think you better just keep your bloody mouth shut Liam," Niall warned, taking a shaky breath.

 

"why?" Liam scoffed. "trouble with the truth?"

 

Niall clenched his fists and unclenched them. it's been building every time Liam so much as blinked. it infuriates Niall. he'd reached his breaking point.

 

"bet you payed for her cab too didn't you?" Liam asked. "wasted twenty pounds on her didn't you? bet she didn't even say thank you because she"

 

in a blink of an eye, Niall shoved the tray of drinks off the table and to the floor. they landed with a crash. he was seeing red.

 

"she fucking makes me happy!" Niall yelled, face inches from Liam's. "you say one more word about her and I'll ruin you, I swear to god."

 

"I just don't know why you don't see what I see!" Liam yelled. "she's no good for you!"

 

like he promised, Niall punched Liam right in the nose. Liam's came soon after, to his lip.

 

louis and Harry tore them apart, shoving Niall away because he'd take any chance he got.

 

"go home Niall," Harry spoke softly, nodding to the door.

 

they were causing a scene. two men were walking towards them to most likely throw them out.

 

Niall brushed passed them, wiping his lip. he couldn't calm down. he was just furious. he's never wanted to hurt anyone like he did in that moment. in the ten years he knew Liam, he's never actually /hated/ him until now.

 

Niall got in his car, barely noticing the way his lip was throbbing and gushing with his anger and adrenaline.

 

at 32, it was his first bar fight. with his best friend.


	6. Chapter 6

 

Niall agreed reluctantly to go out with louis and Harry. he hadn't been feeling great. work was both stressing him out and exhausting him. he didn't feel like doing anything other than sleeping or the occasional cuddling with Ava.

 

she hadn't been feeling too great either. she couldn't sleep and her anxiety seemed to come back at full force.

 

"Harry and I were thinking about moving out of the city," louis told Niall nervously.

 

"like a big house?" Niall asked slowly.

 

"yeah," Harry nodded. "something more family friendly you know?"

 

louis gave Harry a nervous smile, "we don't want to jinx anything but we applied for a child."

 

"that-wow," Niall shook his head, shocked. "that's amazing. I didn't- I didn't know you guys were going to really settle down."

 

"we talked about it for a while and Harry just," louis shook his head smiling. "he just has a way with words, I guess."

 

"I'm really happy for you guys," Niall smiled despite the jealousy burning in his stomach.

 

it was one of those bitter sweet moments. he was so happy for his best friends but at the same time he wanted to be the one settling down, he wanted to be the one waking up next to the love of his life.

 

harry and Louis left around midnight. Niall stayed until last call. he drowned himself in beer and maybe cried a little bit too. sometimes alcohol just makes him emotional.

 

louis wrote Niall's address and their number on his arm because it was likely he wouldn't be forming words properly.

 

"I just i like love her you know," Niall slurred. "she's so pretty and-and she smells really nice but she doesn't pay attention to me."

 

"does she know you like her?" the bar tender asked.

 

Niall nodded taking another big gulp of beer. "maybe I should-maybe I should call her! I'm gonna call her!"

 

___

 

Ava woke up to three missed calls from Niall and two voicemails. her initial thought was something had happened. she quickly checked the messages.

 

"a-Ava" Niall hiccuped. "it's me Niall. I've only had a few drinks I s-swear." he laughed. "David told me to call you. David is the bartender. he's such a nice guy." it was quiet for a long second. "he told me to-to tell you how I feel. d'you know how I feel? I feel like love you. yeah," he laughed again. "I feel like I love you Ava because you're so pretty. and you smell really nice and you give me tea and hug me sometimes. I love your hugs and your place. it's so warm and nice smelling and I just love you."

 

Ava sat clutching her phone in her hand. her heart was pounding in her ears because /wow/. Niall should never drink alone and he should never go throwing the L word around like nothing.

 

she didn't really know how to react to this situation. she kind of wanted to laugh and she kind of wanted to scream into a pillow because she was so smiley but on the other hand she really wanted cry because it's Sunday morning and she /doesn't know what to do/.

 

Ava threw the covers off of her and pulled a pair of sweatpants on. she brushed her teeth not thinking about Niall. she brushed her hair too only thinking a little bit about him. and then she made herself some tea and watched the news thinking about him only sort of. then she had to shower and she was thinking about him and she decided to go for a walk but then she was really thinking about him.

 

"this is so hard," she groaned fumbling with her keys. she dropped them on the floor just as Niall's door open.

 

he was squinting and rubbing his head and mumbled, "Ava?"

 

she was going to either embarrass herself or be completely mean because her feelings were always masked by anger.

 

"hey Niall," she smiled tightly, turning around. "look at you all squinty eyed in the hallway. this hallway is so weird right? it's so long and-and- so what's up?" she laughed nervously.

 

"Ava I have a hangover," Niall mumbled.

 

"what?" her eyes widened. "a hangover? I didn't know you had a hangover. that is so weird!"

 

"Ava shut up," Niall groaned, pulling her into his flat. "my head hurts."

 

"right," she shook her head. "headaches need medicine and-and water!"

 

"Ava I said I have a headache," Niall groaned, sitting down on the kitchen floor. "don't talk so loud."

 

"yeah," she nodded. "okay."

 

Ava filled a glass with water and gave it to Niall. she rummaged around the cupboards and drawers until she found the medicine he needed.

 

she gave him two tablets and made him swallow them and drink all of the water. (her nurse instincts were kicking in.)

 

"I don't remember drinking that much," he mumbled. "I don't remember anything actually."

 

"oh," Ava laughed nervously. "nothing?"

 

"not really."

 

-

 

now Ava was trying to handle this new information the best she could. it was so hard because he was so cute but she was so... so... /Ava/.

 

she saw him everyday. she ate lunch with him and ate dinner with him and sometimes breakfast too. he always smelled so nice and was a proper gentleman to her.

 

she realized, one evening as they were at Niall's office, that she was in fact 29, not 16. she needed to start acting like a 29 year old, not an emotional 16 year old.

 

how did 29 year olds act? she wished she had friends here to teach her how to be a 29 year old.

 

she had a good job and a good flat that was more than enough for her. she just felt like there was no stability in her life. she thought about moving into a house for about two seconds before she realized, Niall would not be moving with her.

 

"you've been acting strange all week," Niall frowned. "what's going on?"

 

"what?" Ava laughed nervously. "I haven't been acting weird, you've been acting weird."

 

"see you're doing it again!" Niall exclaimed. "you do that nervous laugh and then ramble on forever."

 

there was really no way she was getting out of this on. she really had to tell him about this but maybe not now.

 

"i just remembered," Ava grabbed her stuff. "I need milk and the store closes in twenty minutes."

 

it was childish but at least she /could/ get her milk and get away from him.

 

___

 

this time, it was Niall sneaking over. it was almost midnight and Ava was just about to turn all the lights out but Niall was standing in front of her, holding his pillow looking quite shy.

 

"hi," he smiled shyly.

 

"hi," Ava chewed on her bottom lip. this was going to be a long night.

 

"d'you have room?" he asked quietly.

 

Ava nodded. she couldn't find if in herself to smile because she was uneasy and nervous and she knew something was going to happen.

 

Niall shuffled in behind Ava, following her into her bedroom. she took the wall side because obvious, already discussed reasons. Niall bit back a smile as that night replayed in his mind.

 

"keep on your side," Ava said sternly but he knew there was no heat behind her words.

 

"you/ keep on yours, Ava Grace."

 

___

 

it wasn't weird. they were just two friends that sometimes slept together because they can't sleep alone. it was perfectly normal.

 

Ava rolled over, rubbing her eyes, feeling Niall's arms around her waist and his chest against her back.

 

completely normal.

 

he let out a tiny groan because it was Monday and it was bloody six am.

 

"let me go," Ava mumbled, pulling at his arms. "I need to get a shower- and so do you. you stink."

 

"wow," Niall laughed letting her go. "you're brutal at six am."

 

Ava rolled her eyes walking into the bathroom. she was both annoyed and a little uneasy because he was so close.

 

he was so close he could smell her body wash still lingering on her skin. he could smell her shampoo and how it just made everything so much better.

 

"are we still having dinner after work?" Niall asked.

 

"I think so," Ava mumbled with a mouth full of toothpaste. she was even cute this early in the morning.

 

she wasn't completely aware of how not platonic their relationship was. it sounded like they were getting dinner every night at sneaking into each others office for a bit of Chinese and a snog. the complete opposite of the truth.

 

___

 

it took three days before Ava cracked. she couldn't sleep and couldn't really look at Niall without thinking about getting married or having kids or kissing him. it was bad. really bad.

 

"Niall do you love me?" Ava blurted out.

 

they were at his office again and it wasn't that late, only nine and he was doing paper work and she was trying to play angry birds but her mind was wandering.

 

"what?" Niall chuckled.

 

"y-you left me a voicemail," she sat up. "on Saturday. I'll play it."

 

it was just mortifying to listen to. Niall's cheeks were so red. he wanted to crawl in a hole and die because Ava wasn't supposed to hear that. she was never supposed to hear it.

 

"that's a drunken mess isn't," Niall laughed nervously.

 

Ava locked her phone, letting it fall on the couch. she was waiting for an explanation.

 

Niall was quiet, staring at the door. he was silently praying someone, anyone would come in and interrupt them.

 

Ava was staring at him. he knew she was staring. he didn't know what to say. he didn't so much as love her per say. he really liked her- like really liked her.

 

"I don't know what to say..." he trailed off, playing with his collar.

 

"do you love me?" she finally asked.

 

"what no!" he said quickly, recoiling soon after. "I mean no. like love is you know... love. I don't just fall in love with girls over night. I don't love you but I- um." he coughed and ran a hand through his hair. "I really um like you."

 

"oh," she mumbled, relaxing a bit. still, this new found information was nerve racking.

 

"I know you're not in the best place right now," Niall finally looked up at her. "I'm not pushing you to do something you don't want I just wanted- or had to tell you."

 

"no no..." she trailed off, biting her bottom lip. it was her chance. it was her chance to forget about everything Brandon related. she could finally move past it. she could have a nice, happy life.

 

"I want this," she finally whispered, looking him in the eyes for the first time that night. "I-I want you- this. all of it."

 

"are you sure- I'm- I was gonna wait. you're not obligated to erm like me back?"

 

"no I do..." she nodded. Ava was a little wary and a little scared but god she loved the way Nialls hair swept across his forehead and she loved how nice he always smells. her worries were fading away easily.Niall agreed reluctantly to go out with louis and Harry. he hadn't been feeling great. work was both stressing him out and exhausting him. he didn't feel like doing anything other than sleeping or the occasional cuddling with Ava.

 

she hadn't been feeling too great either. she couldn't sleep and her anxiety seemed to come back at full force.

 

"Harry and I were thinking about moving out of the city," louis told Niall nervously.

 

"like a big house?" Niall asked slowly.

 

"yeah," Harry nodded. "something more family friendly you know?"

 

louis gave Harry a nervous smile, "we don't want to jinx anything but we applied for a child."

 

"that-wow," Niall shook his head, shocked. "that's amazing. I didn't- I didn't know you guys were going to really settle down."

 

"we talked about it for a while and Harry just," louis shook his head smiling. "he just has a way with words, I guess."

 

"I'm really happy for you guys," Niall smiled despite the jealousy burning in his stomach.

 

it was one of those bitter sweet moments. he was so happy for his best friends but at the same time he wanted to be the one settling down, he wanted to be the one waking up next to the love of his life.

 

harry and Louis left around midnight. Niall stayed until last call. he drowned himself in beer and maybe cried a little bit too. sometimes alcohol just makes him emotional.

 

louis wrote Niall's address and their number on his arm because it was likely he wouldn't be forming words properly.

 

"I just i like love her you know," Niall slurred. "she's so pretty and-and she smells really nice but she doesn't pay attention to me."

 

"does she know you like her?" the bar tender asked.

 

Niall nodded taking another big gulp of beer. "maybe I should-maybe I should call her! I'm gonna call her!"

 

___

 

Ava woke up to three missed calls from Niall and two voicemails. her initial thought was something had happened. she quickly checked the messages.

 

"a-Ava" Niall hiccuped. "it's me Niall. I've only had a few drinks I s-swear." he laughed. "David told me to call you. David is the bartender. he's such a nice guy." it was quiet for a long second. "he told me to-to tell you how I feel. d'you know how I feel? I feel like love you. yeah," he laughed again. "I feel like I love you Ava because you're so pretty. and you smell really nice and you give me tea and hug me sometimes. I love your hugs and your place. it's so warm and nice smelling and I just love you."

 

Ava sat clutching her phone in her hand. her heart was pounding in her ears because /wow/. Niall should never drink alone and he should never go throwing the L word around like nothing.

 

she didn't really know how to react to this situation. she kind of wanted to laugh and she kind of wanted to scream into a pillow because she was so smiley but on the other hand she really wanted cry because it's Sunday morning and she /doesn't know what to do/.

 

Ava threw the covers off of her and pulled a pair of sweatpants on. she brushed her teeth not thinking about Niall. she brushed her hair too only thinking a little bit about him. and then she made herself some tea and watched the news thinking about him only sort of. then she had to shower and she was thinking about him and she decided to go for a walk but then she was really thinking about him.

 

"this is so hard," she groaned fumbling with her keys. she dropped them on the floor just as Niall's door open.

 

he was squinting and rubbing his head and mumbled, "Ava?"

 

she was going to either embarrass herself or be completely mean because her feelings were always masked by anger.

 

"hey Niall," she smiled tightly, turning around. "look at you all squinty eyed in the hallway. this hallway is so weird right? it's so long and-and- so what's up?" she laughed nervously.

 

"Ava I have a hangover," Niall mumbled.

 

"what?" her eyes widened. "a hangover? I didn't know you had a hangover. that is so weird!"

 

"Ava shut up," Niall groaned, pulling her into his flat. "my head hurts."

 

"right," she shook her head. "headaches need medicine and-and water!"

 

"Ava I said I have a headache," Niall groaned, sitting down on the kitchen floor. "don't talk so loud."

 

"yeah," she nodded. "okay."

 

Ava filled a glass with water and gave it to Niall. she rummaged around the cupboards and drawers until she found the medicine he needed.

 

she gave him two tablets and made him swallow them and drink all of the water. (her nurse instincts were kicking in.)

 

"I don't remember drinking that much," he mumbled. "I don't remember anything actually."

 

"oh," Ava laughed nervously. "nothing?"

 

"not really."

 

-

 

now Ava was trying to handle this new information the best she could. it was so hard because he was so cute but she was so... so... /Ava/.

 

she saw him everyday. she ate lunch with him and ate dinner with him and sometimes breakfast too. he always smelled so nice and was a proper gentleman to her.

 

she realized, one evening as they were at Niall's office, that she was in fact 29, not 16. she needed to start acting like a 29 year old, not an emotional 16 year old.

 

how did 29 year olds act? she wished she had friends here to teach her how to be a 29 year old.

 

she had a good job and a good flat that was more than enough for her. she just felt like there was no stability in her life. she thought about moving into a house for about two seconds before she realized, Niall would not be moving with her.

 

"you've been acting strange all week," Niall frowned. "what's going on?"

 

"what?" Ava laughed nervously. "I haven't been acting weird, you've been acting weird."

 

"see you're doing it again!" Niall exclaimed. "you do that nervous laugh and then ramble on forever."

 

there was really no way she was getting out of this on. she really had to tell him about this but maybe not now.

 

"i just remembered," Ava grabbed her stuff. "I need milk and the store closes in twenty minutes."

 

it was childish but at least she /could/ get her milk and get away from him.

 

___

 

this time, it was Niall sneaking over. it was almost midnight and Ava was just about to turn all the lights out but Niall was standing in front of her, holding his pillow looking quite shy.

 

"hi," he smiled shyly.

 

"hi," Ava chewed on her bottom lip. this was going to be a long night.

 

"d'you have room?" he asked quietly.

 

Ava nodded. she couldn't find if in herself to smile because she was uneasy and nervous and she knew something was going to happen.

 

Niall shuffled in behind Ava, following her into her bedroom. she took the wall side because obvious, already discussed reasons. Niall bit back a smile as that night replayed in his mind.

 

"keep on your side," Ava said sternly but he knew there was no heat behind her words.

 

"you/ keep on yours, Ava Grace."

 

___

 

it wasn't weird. they were just two friends that sometimes slept together because they can't sleep alone. it was perfectly normal.

 

Ava rolled over, rubbing her eyes, feeling Niall's arms around her waist and his chest against her back.

 

completely normal.

 

he let out a tiny groan because it was Monday and it was bloody six am.

 

"let me go," Ava mumbled, pulling at his arms. "I need to get a shower- and so do you. you stink."

 

"wow," Niall laughed letting her go. "you're brutal at six am."

 

Ava rolled her eyes walking into the bathroom. she was both annoyed and a little uneasy because he was so close.

 

he was so close he could smell her body wash still lingering on her skin. he could smell her shampoo and how it just made everything so much better.

 

"are we still having dinner after work?" Niall asked.

 

"I think so," Ava mumbled with a mouth full of toothpaste. she was even cute this early in the morning.

 

she wasn't completely aware of how not platonic their relationship was. it sounded like they were getting dinner every night at sneaking into each others office for a bit of Chinese and a snog. the complete opposite of the truth.

 

___

 

it took three days before Ava cracked. she couldn't sleep and couldn't really look at Niall without thinking about getting married or having kids or kissing him. it was bad. really bad.

 

"Niall do you love me?" Ava blurted out.

 

they were at his office again and it wasn't that late, only nine and he was doing paper work and she was trying to play angry birds but her mind was wandering.

 

"what?" Niall chuckled.

 

"y-you left me a voicemail," she sat up. "on Saturday. I'll play it."

 

it was just mortifying to listen to. Niall's cheeks were so red. he wanted to crawl in a hole and die because Ava wasn't supposed to hear that. she was never supposed to hear it.

 

"that's a drunken mess isn't," Niall laughed nervously.

 

Ava locked her phone, letting it fall on the couch. she was waiting for an explanation.

 

Niall was quiet, staring at the door. he was silently praying someone, anyone would come in and interrupt them.

 

Ava was staring at him. he knew she was staring. he didn't know what to say. he didn't so much as love her per say. he really liked her- like really liked her.

 

"I don't know what to say..." he trailed off, playing with his collar.

 

"do you love me?" she finally asked.

 

"what no!" he said quickly, recoiling soon after. "I mean no. like love is you know... love. I don't just fall in love with girls over night. I don't love you but I- um." he coughed and ran a hand through his hair. "I really um like you."

 

"oh," she mumbled, relaxing a bit. still, this new found information was nerve racking.

 

"I know you're not in the best place right now," Niall finally looked up at her. "I'm not pushing you to do something you don't want I just wanted- or had to tell you."

 

"no no..." she trailed off, biting her bottom lip. it was her chance. it was her chance to forget about everything Brandon related. she could finally move past it. she could have a nice, happy life.

 

"I want this," she finally whispered, looking him in the eyes for the first time that night. "I-I want you- this. all of it."

 

"are you sure- I'm- I was gonna wait. you're not obligated to erm like me back?"

 

"no I do..." she nodded. Ava was a little wary and a little scared but god she loved the way Nialls hair swept across his forehead and she loved how nice he always smells. her worries were fading away easily.

**Author's Note:**

> this is also on wattpad which obviously the chapters are shorter on there so I'm combining 2-3 chapters.


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